The Phoenix Prayer

The frame is collapsing
We’ve built these towers way too high
The sun sets in the palms of our hands
And burns a hole in our bodies
Where the light shines upon our darker selves
Turning our arsenic prayers into prey
The people fall from the windows
And burst into colors, illuminating the streets below
The animals cheer and run wild
Running faster, jumping higher than ever before
They gaze at the stars and begin to form dreams for the first time
And evolve into architects
Together they start to rebuild the frame
"We’ll build it right this time," they say
"We’ll build it without ignorance,
Without dominance leading our hearts.
From this day forward,
We will take steps in the right direction
And lead ourselves to heaven."
But with eyes set to the sun
They become blinded
And begin to walk backwards
They construct these towers higher and higher
They must become faster, and stronger
Enslaving animals of their own like their fathers did
They reach skyward
Grasping for clouds to sit upon as their thrones
But a flaw hides within their calculations
For the frame starts to collapse
They’ve built these towers way too high
The sun sets in the palms of their hands
And burns a hole in their bodies
Where the light shines upon their darker selves
Turning their arsenic prayers into prey
And like a phoenix
The architect within themselves is reborn into their children
And they begin to rebuild once again

Biosignature

The silence lifts as the soundtrack to his life comes into tune
Cross out yesterday, it's just one X closer
To ripping out this month from the books
And he repeats the process until the sunrise blinds his eyes
And buries him with the moon

This is an autobiography of what it feels like
To feel like your life is made of letters and ink
As the pages turn, we sing to ourselves
Why do these words repeat again and again?

We make dreams of ascending skyscrapers
But the elevator reads "out of order"
So he tries to erase the words
Take to the stairs; Just keep climbing and climbing
And climbing and climbing...

Reach for the clouds; They're as thin as the shadows
That follow our footsteps in the setting sun
Will we ever wake up, will we ever wake up
To the sound of our songs on the radio
But the frequencies ring from the morning alarms
Repeating the X's that cover our calendars
So he falls from the edge against the rising sun
Painting the pavement with a crimson period

This is an autobiography of what it feels like
To feel like your life is made of letters and ink
As the pages turn, we sing to ourselves
Why do these words repeat again and again?

Did he jump or did he fall?
The blood only bares hues of hypotheses
The forensics may never know...
Because he burned his book
With the cigarettes that inked his lungs

Love Like Origami

like most encounters, this one starts off simple.
like a blank piece of paper.
over time it has become a beautifully crafted piece of origami.
an artificial swan, perfected by perfect folds.

and sometimes this swan takes to the skies.
coming alive, through our hands.
at this point our breaths synchronize breathless.
embracing as one, where the sun meets the tide.

she is my blue sky.
the clouds act as a painted veil; the art of separation.
but on clear days, her beauty secures my stare.
not letting go until the sun sets.
and even though the darkness keeps her from me (for now).
i know she's there, waiting until morning.

and every time i feel her touch, (the light invading darkness).
i know this swan will never unfold.
for she is mine, our love perfected.
as everlasting as the sound of oceans.

Figures In Reverse

We walk as men but we'll fall as parasites

Take a step back and forget how to breathe...

Forget how to envisage a future of reason
As our hearts begin to beat by machinery
I've relied on you my whole life
A system of alphabets, none of which I speak
And you've let me know that I'll bury myself without you
You've let me know that I'll bury myself without you

By the time the clocks stop, we'll go blind
By the time the clocks stop, we'll go blind

Bury me within the systems failure
Only the mindless could save us, save us from silence

Bury me within the binary
We're dying in exponentials
And by the time we open our eyes to witness the execution
Our children will be blind
By the time we open our eyes to witness the execution
Our children will be blind

I've relied on you my whole life
But you've let me know that I'll bury myself without you
I've relied on you my whole life
But you've let me know that I'll bury myself without you

By the time the clocks stop, we'll go blind
By the time the clocks stop, we'll go blind
By the time the clocks stop, we'll go blind

White Ocean

These flashes of red and blue are not my own
But I mourn in "what if's"
With the love for a stranger

So many unread stories, so many unknown authors
Until these sirens greet us
We'll live as politicians
Building cities for ourselves

As I listen to the ocean through this seashell
I know these sounds of waves are just fictional
As I listen to the ambulance through my car window
I know these sounds of departure are factual

These flashes of red and blue are not my own
But I mourn in "what if's"
With the love for a stranger

Pull back the blinds and let the light into your homes
And step outside to breathe in the chalk outlines
If the phone rings with the songs of a paramedic
I'll take your hand and sing to you, a stranger.

As I listen to the ocean through this seashell
I know these sounds of waves are just fictional
As I listen to the ambulance through my car window
I know these sounds of departure are factual

Thinking of You

Enclosed in a predetermined car crash, (I'm suffering from ataxia once again)
The streetlights impale the pavement, confusion impaling reason
By mistake, or perhaps a motive for temporary amnesia
I have been taken under intoxication for the last time

Everything feels like nothing matters
Although it's possible what matters hasn't all been lost...yet
And I start to remember her (the only thought vodka hasn't impaired)
The visuals becoming almost too real...

And then there she was, her frail body next to mine
Her blood soaking the interior (a constant reminder of my misfortunes)
And somehow, amidst this horrifying accident, disoriented I remain
Like a dove, she lay peacefully, her smile as golden as the sun

And even though it has been a year since the incident (since I declared sobriety)
I can still remember the last words she whispered so very long ago...

"All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy;
for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves;
we must die to one life before we can enter another." [Anatole France]

I am still alive. I am breathing, despite my deepest faults and regrets.
To sum up life in these three words has been my hardest accomplishment yet:

It goes on.

Of Life, I Am Lost

My heart: the lampost bearing the blind
I have the hope of turning mutes to songbirds
Even the sound of my dissonant violins (my own mouth beholds a discordant orchestra)
Can't bring me from touching the sun (that hides the heavens, embracing the touch of hell)

I'm speaking in unfinished phrases, broken languages
The lies I tell are as equal as the truths, as the truths
Those who I've loved, let live, let die
Are now the insignificant details that fill our lives, fill our lives

I have left not one, but an ocean of parting words (all have drowned within this melody)
My memories filling the pages of my being (the ink runs dry to signal the curtains)
And to you, the listener, the reader, the liver
I give to you my last breath...

This life was worth living, I can say, since it is what I made it.